I knew I had my work cut for me to help her leverage success. First on the list, get her to see the opportunity to take control of her life and buy into the work of change. On my drive home I started to build a mental plan to help her help herself.

Clients Have Unique Strengths and Weaknesses

In health coaching we shift paradigms and foster positive change. Clients who book time generally want to reboot or reinvigorate their lives. Unfortunately not every client understands or is prepared for the work of change. As coaches we need to constantly learn about client issues and bring tools to bear to leverage success.

After a while health coaches meet a whole spectrum of people. It is crucial to see and honor clients as individuals and be realistic about your skill set and who you can help succeed.

Does the client see the need for change and have a desire to do things differently?

They require support to build;

• in the moment awareness,
• discipline to change entrenched behaviors,
• Habits in alignment with new goals.

A health coach can adds value by shining the light of awareness, sharing tools to build discipline and supporting the journey. Awareness, discipline and support are a powerful trio to drive sustainable improvement and leverage success. Unfortunately not all clients are at a optimal stage of readiness for the work of transformation

Assess your client’s stage of readiness and identify potential blocks. Is your client a visual, auditory, or kinesthetic learner? Do they have trouble starting something new or are they keen to start but don’t sick with it. Are they completely overloaded taking care of everyone but themselves?  Understanding your clients strengths and weaknesses will empower you as a coach. What client archetypes are you working with right now?

5 Archetypes of Tough Clients

Overachiever  (Not so tough)

A client who is easy and fun to work with, clear and mobile in a good way. She is ready, willing, and able to learn and will put in the effort to change. She writes a note before each class to let you know where she wants to focus and does all her homework. Ask her to read a book and she brings it to the next session with all kinds of bookmarks and questions.

This client is truly ready to take charge of her life and experience. Likely after a few months and big progress, she is ready to graduate, because she is doing so well. This client is a gift that gives you the perspective to deal with more challenging situations.

Delicate Flower

A client who comes in with full blown disease, ojas (natural resiliency) depleted, on lots of prescription meds, or someone whose life is crashing or is pregnant or in the middle of menopause, very old or very young.

Dial back the pressure and set their expectation for slower progress. Meet them where they are and engage with their health care team to carefully move them forward. Kaizen them towards their goals.

A very delicate client can be easily overwhelmed or even derailed by too much intensity. The challenge as a health coach is to set the speed of progress in way that supports her physiology and desire.

Just Stuck  

Clients who comes in who really do want change but who are tough and stuck with no idea how to get unstuck. In Ayurveda we call this low energy stuckness tamas.

Tamasic clients need a lot of support to make change. You will need to stir things up to help this person take action on their own behalf. Look for the glue that is holding them in place, is it fear or just habit. It may be that you discover the person wants change, but is not ready for the actions required to manifest it.

All Talk And No Action

She or he wants to use the sessions to vent. We have all met someone who continually chews on their problems and feelings from the past.

Start by gently redirecting the discussion, or just outline the purpose of each appointment and help her or him focus. Then bring activities like a stretch or a foot massage or putting self care on the calendar into each session to mirror taking action with them.

Challenge them to commit to a small doable actions and follow up. As a health coach it is great to have empathy for the tough situations we all face in life. But venting about the past, missing the present and neglecting the future helps no one.

One Foot On Gas,  The Other On The Brake.

Clients may unconsciously self sabotage. I often see three subtypes of this one. The client who won’t try anything you suggest. Encourage them to replace their “No, But” with “Yes, And…”

The client who uses a list of excuses for lack of effort. With this client I share that I use “shoulda woulda coulda, the dog ate my homework” when I catch myself making excuses. Laughter can help bring perspective on our behavior. As grown ups we are responsible for our own choices and only change will drive change.

Finally is someone who cancels at the last minute. For last minute cancellations, decide what is acceptable and make it clear. A coach’s time is valuable and it denigrates the work and the relationship when clients abuse a cancellation policy.

All clients have their ups and downs, coaches too. Recognizing who you are dealing with drives better solutions. The wisdom to understand you can’t help everyone is a huge.  Sometimes it’s just not the right fit or the right time.  When you do engage, follow these 8 coaching tips to leverage success for you and especially for your clients.

8 Coaching Tips To Leverage Success  

• Pre Screen.  Not every coach is right for every client.  If you think it is a really bad fit, you are doing everyone a favor by recommending a friend who is better suited. It is about success for the client, and she or he will respect your honesty.
• Set a Goal(s). At the beginning of each session set goals and make them measurable.  This will focus each session. It is fine to change the goal based on client communication.  Have a brainstorming session to refine the goals.
• Hold the seat of the Coach. We learn in yoga teacher training to “hold the seat of the teacher”, but this applies with client work as well. You are there as a professional resource to help your client. Don’t get sucked in. Keep the focus on the work and personal stuff and distractions out of the session.
• Use the parking lot when necessary. Decide with the client, how to best utilize your time together and put other issues and distractions in the parking lot to be dealt with later.
• Create clear accountability.  At the end of each session review to do’s on both sides and secure client buy in. Follow up so the client understands the importance of homework. Habits are built in the daily doing.
• Fill your tool box with a wide range of powerful techniques.  Different clients learn and engage in different ways. One person might be willing to read a book or blog and another will need a podcast or a practice to anchor into new habits.
• Plug into your community. Reach out to your health coaching community and teachers if you need perspective or have a question. The yoga health coaching forum is a well spring of support.
• Graduate clients when the time is right. Help when and how you can, then physically and energetically release the client. Sometimes clients need space to work or a new support system to work in. Create a graceful transition that allows the client freedom to work with you again if the need arises.

Ask for Guidance

I often say a prayer and ask the universe to invite people I can help into my practice.  It goes like this.  

“Please bring me the clients I can truly help. May I grow in my ability to affect change for the better in their lives through our work together.”  

I do the best I can to empathize, understand and motivate sustainable positive growth for whoever asks my help.

Connect to the Community

Do you have a favorite client who challenges you as a health coach? How do you deal? Share in the comments and get some input down below. You are not alone. As a community we can help each other. There is opportunity for growth and learning for all of us.

Tips on habits evolution and how it can help you

• Cultivate your own mental, emotional, and physical thrive
• Influence other people in your life without nagging or telling them what to do
• Teach clients more effectively on what they need to do to help themselves by displaying your own passion for the habits you’ve adopted
• Feel comfortable talking to all people at every stage of life about what habits will help them thrive

Tune in and learn how to

• Integrate Ayurvedic habits into your own life, and see them change the lives of those around you
• Display your passion for the habits you have adopted so your Tribe can become as excited about them as you are
• Help people living with disease to adopt habits that will help them live a more comfortable and fulfilled life, regardless of their disease status

Show Highlights

• 4:15 – Annette lists the habits that made the biggest difference in her mental and emotional Thrive, and describes her evolution as a Yoga Health Coach
• 7:30 – When you are passionate about something, your energy draws people in: you have to understand, believe in, love, and trust the Ayurvedic habits in order to teach them to other people
• 9:40 – Focus on yourself first, and not on changing anyone else: by changing your own habits, your positive energy influences those around you and inspires them to change their habits too
• 14:10 – Changing small habits can make a huge difference in your life and the lives of others: these small habits provide comfort as well as inspiration to make larger changes
• 16:55 – Much of the time, we view people who have a disease as the disease itself. Annette and Cate discuss coaching people with diseases and making sure to remove the stigma of the disease and to treat them like the human beings they are.
• 19:30 – Everyone needs these habits in their life. Connect with the person in front of you, regardless of their disease status or stage of life.

Links from the Conversation

• Become a Yoga Health Coach

Favorite Quotes from the Conversation

• “There are ways to work these habits into your life despite how difficult you may think they are.” – Annette Shellenbarger
• “The more you live it, the more the right people are attracted to you.” – Annette Shellenbarger
• “We need to fall in love with that which works for us.” – Cate Stillman
• “It goes beyond the mental, and it’s at the cellular level… it becomes part of you” – Annette Shellenbarger
• “That’s what these habits do: you start taking care of yourself and loving yourself, so then you start to see hope.” – Annette Shellenbarger
• “They need you to help them with these habits because — guess what? — no one else is.” – Cate Stillman

Guest Bio

Annette Shellenbarger is a Registered Nurse, Ayurvedic Health Counselor, Registered Yoga Teacher, and Certified Yoga Health Coach. As a Registered Nurse, she worked in a kidney transplant unit, pulmonary care unit, oncology, trauma and surgery units, and Public Health.

She is also certified in nutrition through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, and is currently a student at California College of Ayurveda. Her life’s desire is to help people change the way they live in order to change the way they feel and age, and is especially passionate about helping people prevent and reverse chronic disease. Annette’s Facebook & Website.

In this episode, Annie Barrett speaks to Dana Skoglund — Yoga Health Coach to Yoga Health Coach — and learns how Dana has mastered the Yogi superpower of bending time. Dana shares her best strategies and tips for being productive and effective as a Yoga teacher, Yoga Health Coach, mother, and entrepreneur.

Annie raps with Dana about Mastering + Bending Time:

• Understand Yogi superpowers and why, as householder Yogis, learning to bend time (a.k.a. become a master of your time) is better than walking on water
• Dana’s struggles with time management and stress as a solopreneur and new mom
• Why women haven’t been getting good self-care and time-management models, and how Yoga Health Coaches can change that
• Dana’s strategies to help Yoga Health Coaches get organized and get in integrity with time via quarterly planning, time-blocking, and daily check-ins
• How Dana helps coaching clients learn time management

What you’ll get out of tuning in:

• How to balance your own self-care and take care of your business
• How structure enables presence and flow, and how they’re the keys to easeful living
• Learn strategies for getting organized using time-management tools
• Learn Dana’s favorite books and resources on task-management and time-bending

Links:

• Dana’s Productivity Resources
• The ONE Thing
• 12-Week Year
• James Clear on Productivity

Show Highlights:

• 3:30 — Here’s a quick rundown of Yogi superpowers you can nurture and develop. Dana has mastered the superpower of time-bending.
• 5:30 — It’s a common feeling among people that they simply don’t have enough time during the day to get done what they want to do. It leads to an experience of chronic stress. Dana and Annie agree it’s an issue in a culture that expects too much.
• 9:00 — Yoga Health Coaches teach people how to take care of themselves first. It’s an important skill that people aren’t doing, and it’s depleting their immune systems. We can’t be effective coaches if we aren’t taking care of ourselves, either.
• 16:15 — Learning new ways we can organize ourselves and our time, especially as we become Yoga Health Coaches, helps us and our clients.
• 19:00 — There are so many different habits and realms of learning within Yoga Health Coaching, and this highlights the importance of goal setting. What’s important for you to create next? Dana explains how to focus your attention and efforts here with quarterly, weekly, and daily planning.
• 23:30 — Dana expands on her explanation of time-blocking and creating a schedule that supports her. How can you make clear boundaries around self, work, and family time?
• 28:00 — Dana explains how she teaches the art of time-bending to her clients with meal planning, journaling, and turning the action of making better choices into a habit.

Favorite Quotes:

• “These habits we develop are kind of like Yoga superpowers.”
• “Women put too much pressure on themselves to do it all.”
• “We need to learn the skill of taking care of ourselves first. It doesn’t come naturally, and we don’t really know how to do it.”
• “There was no choice. I had to learn how to use my time differently and to be able to figure out ways to get all these new systems into place.”
• “There’s always room for improvement and ways to refine, and it’s continually expanding. But we do get to a point where we feel like we’re in charge of our time.”

BIO:

Dana Skoglund is a Certified Yoga Health Coach, Yoga teacher, and mother of two rambunctious young boys. She’s been studying Yoga since 2000 and teaching since 2004, and she has over 1,000 hours of training in the styles of Jivamukti, Anusara, and Sridaiva. Her desires to take her health and well-being into her own hands and to learn how to keep her family healthy led her to Ayurveda in 2011. After implementing daily routines from Ayurveda and noticing the profound impacts they had on her energy and happiness, she began coaching clients into these better body habits in 2013. She aims to inspire others about the importance of health habits in crafting the lives of their dreams. Dana is also deeply passionate about travel, adventure, learning, movement of any kind, and the arts.

• Pull out your potential through mentoring.
• Build close mentoring relationships by giving trust a chance!
• Network through mentoring.

Be a part of your own growing process!

Cate’s tips for Mentors:

1. Honor the mentoring relationship and use your own experience to mentor and guide.
2. Show that you care.
3. Don’t tweak out, reach out!

Eyes on the prize! Orient yourself and others – Get better results faster.

Do you ever find yourself hiding behind a mask. As adults we are really good at putting on our public “face” and not allowing anyone to see what’s really going on inside.

At times – these masks even come in handy. I put on my “I mean business face” when I need action and I need it NOW!  People stop chit chatting and jump to comply with my authority. My “mean mom” face gets a lot more action out of my teen girls when it’s time to clean the house than my ‘understanding, you can confide in me face’ which means I clean the house by myself.

But the question for today is…

Are you wearing a mask when you coach and should you?

I’m working on being in better alignment with my own habits. After all this is partly why I went into the Yoga Health Coaching program. When I’m coaching I have to lead by example and that’s keeps me in line. But can I do it on my own when there is no course running?  Can I go deeper on my habit growth curve and get more of the habits to be automatic?

I find as I explore getting better habit integrity that I’m hiding behind masks.

My leader, “she’s got it all together” mask is often a front for what is really going on inside and this false front is keeping me from being truly honest with myself and tackling the deeper issues.  I find myself “hiding” the fact that I was working at 10pm by scheduling emails to arrive in the early morning hours instead of admitting I was working late or doing anything to change my patterns even though I know that I’m sacrificing tomorrow’s energy by trying to get the last few things done.

In Japanese Culture these masks are a given part of how society works. They even have names.

Honne – is the true sound, our true nature. It’s often seen as being in conflict with what’s expected in society and kept hidden. It’s that side of you that is only revealed to close friends.

Tatemae – is your built-in facade. The front that you put up to conform to what’s expected in society and by your “position”. To keep up appearances this outer mask “leads to the outright telling of lies, because the true inner-most feelings don’t want to get exposed.” (Wikipedia)

This outer mask hides our true nature and prevents conflict.  

Conflict though is what leads to change, transformation and growth. As Cate presented at the last Yoga Healer retreat when we create effective teams (or coaching groups) after trust, conflict is the next building block for an effective team. Letting go of the fear of conflict allows us to get to the root of an issue where we can truly transform.

• Back in the 1960’s D.W. Winnicott coined the terms “True Self” and “False Self” in psychoanalysis.
• The True Self being; spontaneous and authentic, the feeling of being alive, and our “feeling” self.
• The False Self is a defensive facade or an appearance of being real. It lacks spontaneity and feels empty.

These concepts ring true for many yogis as the “self” and the “ego” we study in the sutras and the Bhagavad Gita. Our habits are another way for us to uncover that true self when we allow the masks to slip away, dive deeper into conflict and truly transform.

The cue to how thick my mask can be is when feedback from clients is the polar opposite from how I feel inside.

• You’re always so calm (I’m in full panic attack mode)
• You’ve got it all together (I feel like a mess inside)
• You do so much (I don’t get nearly enough done in a day)
• You’re such a success (My business is in financial crisis)

How can our outer persona be so different from what’s going on in our own minds?  

Is Your Mask Holding You Back and Your Clients?

At times we tell ourselves that we need the mask.

• No one will work with me if they know what I’m really like inside.
• My clients respond better if I’m confident and in charge.
• Someone needs to be strong for them to feel safe.

What mask are you wearing when you coach? Do you have an “I have it all together mask” Or as another coach I spoke to told me, she has the opposite mask. Her students and clients see a “fun loving, easygoing” persona, while inside she’s an intensely deep thinker with frequent anxiety attacks.  

At times the masks almost seem natural – it’s our going to work face.

Have you ever considered how this mask might be holding you and your clients back?

My outer mask allows me to hide and live out of integrity with myself. When I’m wearing my mask I’m not truly admitting where I am truly at with my habits. And this allows me to be less than my true potential.

The masks also…

• Give your coaching clients an excuse; “She really doesn’t get it, I don’t need to follow her advice, she’s never experienced this.”
• Sets a distance between you and your clients, making it hard to connect heart to heart.
• Makes the coaching experience all about perfection, guilt, and punishment instead of the realities of life.

But the truth is that the work we do as coaches is on a level that goes deeper than the conversations we have in “society.” There is a connection that happens on a level that’s below the mask. Thus the distance that the mask puts between you and your clients is hindering both your growth and theirs.

In this deep work the mask is not invisible, it’s seen by the heart and creates a disconnect that may be unconsciously pushing clients away or allowing current clients to hide behind their own masks and avoid making a deeper transformation.

The trick then is how do we peel away the mask?

Will it be a Kaizen approach or cold turkey… For me, my masks are so deep that it’s going to have to be Kaizen. It will start with acknowledging the masks, admitting when I’m not in integrity. First to myself and also to my tribe.

Next will be a scorecard to track what’s really going on and to keep me motivated to step it up a notch (I’m a sucker for the adult sticker charts where you colour in the mandalas!).  I’ve got an accountability partner onside to help with support and I’ll report back and let you know how it’s really going!

Action Steps for Striping Away the Masks

Here’s the plan – if you are inspired to strip away your own masks feel free to follow along.

• I’m tackling all 10 habits at once – after all I’ve been through them many times before it’s time to step up and let them do their job.
• Besides when I’ve gone through it before focussing on one a week I tend to let the others slide and don’t feel the full effect of the habit stacking.
• I want to start moving deeper so I need the full base-line that you get from the habits to see this success.
• I’ve set a baseline for each of the habits and then I’ll start fine tuning and pushing the growth edge from there once that is sustainable.

Where are we Aiming?

I’m not aiming for 100% – If I can do 50% in the first week, 60% the next I’ll be at 80% by month end which will be amazing. Slow and steady…

I’m checking in with my partner once a week and I’ll post my sticker chart on the YHC forum to access the collective energy of the group. Peeling away at the mask that says I need to be perfect and should have had these together long ago!

To make this fun and not punishment I am viewing this as a challenge – anyone else want to join in feel free to print out your own “sticker chart” and play along!

I’ll report back and let you know how it’s really going!

Have you been feeling some movement from deep inside to make a leap in your work? Maybe to a new position within the same organization? Or maybe into a whole new career?

It took time to build the confidence, systems and support to make my own leap. After almost twenty years with the same company, I was able to make the leap by establishing a clear pathway towards my love for yoga, aligning with nature’s rhythms and habit evolution. Here’s a summary of my journey and a few tips that may help you on yours.

I am a lifelong learner and someone who is always seeking new avenues for personal and professional development. While working full time, teaching yoga, and running a yoga studio, I began participating in the educational courses at Yogahealer.com. I began with my first Yogidetox in 2010 followed by the Living Ayurveda Course in 2011. This would launch my family and I on a multi-year journey towards greater health, vibrancy and connection. It would also project me personally and professionally towards a new level of confidence, a renewed clarity of my own desires and connect me to a supportive tribe, which would lead me towards the creation of my own business.

In 2014 I began the Yoga Health Coaching program. I had a 3 month old and was juggling being a new mom, embarking on a new learning path and working full time. I would kiss my son on the head as I left him with loving childcare in our home and find myself arriving at my office thinking, “Really? You’re going to leave that ball of LIGHT to come in here and do THIS?”  The first time I had this thought I broke down in tears between emails and phone calls. The second and third time it happened, it became more and more obvious I needed to do something about it.

But what was I going to do? I was terrified.

Some days the idea of leaving seemed so simple. It was a small reorienting of my life’s purpose, no big deal.  Right? In the relative domain, all I had to do was write a letter of resignation. Piece of cake. All of the details felt soooo BIG!! For weeks I found myself paralyzed with resistance. The pulsation of fear and possibility would move with a force that would somedays drive me to tears. I would later learn these two emotions, uncertainty and possibility are on the same energetic spectrum and have similar responses in the physical body.  They feel the same, it was how I was framing the feeling. What if I could reframe the feeling I had defined as fear or uncertainty in my body as a feeling of possibility or excitement? What if I could begin to build a relationship with both the uncertainty and the possibility in a way that would no longer be so paralyzing?

This launched me into a series of practices that would help build my confidence and reset my mind to taking the leap, write a letter of resignation and step into the next chapter of my life. Here are three practices that significantly helped me:

1. Build Awareness Around Uncertainty

Begin to recognize your own voice of uncertainty or fear. Spend a week writing down all the fears, fixed thoughts or limiting beliefs.  Start noticing how you are talking to yourself around making a shift.  The talk that surfaces when you begin to think of yourself in a new role, new chapter or new way of being.

2. Cultivate a Relationship with Possibility.

Start making a list of affirmations to replace the limiting thoughts. For each one of the limiting thoughts you have written down, tap into your Highest Self for the perspective from the place of possibility. You may find the limiting thoughts flow more naturally and turning your thoughts into affirmations of what’s to come, might be hard. You may need to sit quietly, bypassing your mind as you ask your Highest Self if the limiting thought is even true?

3. Replace Uncertainty with Possibility

When your mind starts playing the old story, actively replace it with the voice of possibility. Use this as an affirmation when the voice of fear presents itself and start to carve a growth mindset around the conversation, one that is in the field of potentiality and possibility.

Through this exact practice I realized I had an old belief that I needed a job with a benefits package and I wouldn’t be able to afford it as an entrepreneur. Given the organization I worked for was well-known in the community for having a great benefits package, why would I leave when it was so sought after? The funny thing was, when I began untangling my story around the benefits, I realized I didn’t actually “benefit” from all aspects of the so called benefits package. They were benefits to some people, but not me. The more I sat with my story, I tracked it back to advice I had been given when I graduated from college and going off on my own to “get a job with benefits.”

By revealing the old story of needing my work to have a great benefits package, I realized the real benefits were working in greater alignment with my purpose, having more time with my family and creating my own schedule. It was clear my outdated belief and story had become a true obstacle and it was holding me back from the life I desired.

I rewrote the story and aligned with my higher truth. I re-framed the physical sensations I had once associated with fear and uncertainty to “possibility” and “excitement”.

The gap between the two extremes lessened. My mindset shifted, I gained clarity in my vision for my future and I was able to take the leap with a renewed sense of myself. I now benefit from more time with my family, being in charge of my schedule and working daily in alignment with my higher purpose.

And most of all, I learned that the distance between uncertainty and fear was up to me, and wasn’t such a big leap after all.

Then, I taped the images to my wall next to where I started my home practice

Having the poses on the wall was a convincing reminder to get on the mat and do the practice

I learned their sanskrit names and the alignment

As my practice advanced, I’d replace the poses I knew with the ones I did not

The Sun Salutation, or Surya Namaskar series was the first photocopy on my wall

It also stayed the longest, as an invitation for me to get on my mat and get moving

My friend and colleague, Bruce Bowditch lent me his perfect drawings of Surya Namaskar for the printable Cheat Sheet

If you’re happy about that, please leave a comment and perhaps we can convince him to lend us more advanced sequences

Move it or Lose it

Think of doing sun salutations daily for the rest of your life

You will be able to get up off the floor when you’re 90

Just do a few each day for the rest of your life

Start with 10 a day for a month

Your yoga practice may or may not grow from there… but you’ll still be able to ge tup off the floor when you’re old and grey …or older and whiter

Sun Salutations Upon Arising

The morning routine is simple – wake up

Hydrate

Eliminate waste from your bladder, bowels, and sense organs

Move

The move part is the sun salutation

Don’t eat before you move or you will be less aware that day

Set Yourself Up

Put your mat in the same spot each morning

Face the direction of the rising sun

Clear the space of clutter and your mind will be able to focus on the practice

Stand at the front of your mat, palms together

Invoke a spirit of gratitude for the time and space to practice

Offer your practice for a higher good

Prioritize Prana

Inhale to open your body, exhale to close your body

Breathe deeply and through your nose to open your innards to prana for the day

Single Task

Turn your focus to letting the breathe lead your movements

Follow the breathe like a surfer riding a wave

Without the wave … the surfer doesn’t get to ride

Move gracefully

Smile from the inside out

Jump for Joy

Meet my friend, Bruce Bowditch, artist and author of The Yoga Practice Guide After you’ve mastered fluid movement add jumpings

Squeeze your hands and arms towards the midlines, and on an exhale spring your hips over your shoulders

Mix it Up

Most students start their home practice with sun salutations

Next, you will add in standing pose variations and handstands

Soon your 10 sun salutations becomes your well-rounded home practice

Get Bruce’s Practice Guide for more sequences to deepen your practice

Asana images used by permission

 Copyright Bruce Bowditch, Third Eye Press

And remember… if you want more cheat sheet practices, make sure to leave a comment and perhaps we can convince Bruce